October 2004 Archives
Propaganda Pictures
The Public Affairs office takes silly pictures of silly people. I found this out on Thursday when I stopped by to have my picture taken for the Students’ Union website. “The pictures are really professional,” we were warned. Consequently,…Continue reading "Propaganda Pictures"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 30, 2004 in Ideas & Images
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Pumpkins Against Drunk Driving
The pumpkins didn’t do anything wrong: they were just peacefully congregating on a table. But that didn’t deter us from sadistically jamming knifes into their flesh, carving orifices where no orifices were before. “I want to see agony,” I…Continue reading "Pumpkins Against Drunk Driving"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 29, 2004 in Various Positions
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You Go Girl!
I learned two valuable things in my English seminar today. First, I’m becoming an asshole. Second, I’m losing patience with the English program. For two years I sat through endless lectures disagreeing vehemently with everything said. I get angry when…Continue reading "You Go Girl!"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 28, 2004 in Ideas & Images
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Flight
Now there is an ‘us’: an intoxicating mixture of her and me, emotion and experience, wants and needs. We need to celebrate this new creation — we need to go on an adventure. This winter we’ll do something daring and…Continue reading "Flight"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 27, 2004 in Various Positions
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Another Eleven Sentences About You
Let’s take things out of context again: I forgot to mention something fantastic. I appear to be the only male Revolutionary Knitter. I went home and hid under my sheets until my problems went away. I need more butter or…Continue reading "Another Eleven Sentences About You"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 27, 2004 in Sentences About You
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Cohen and Necrophilia
“Yes! What’s not to like about necrophilia?” I demanded pounding my hand on the table.Continue reading "Cohen and Necrophilia"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 26, 2004 in Writing & the Media
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Bridges in Cambridge
Apparently, I managed to shock everyone this Sunday at the Student Publications dinner by not doing anything stupid. “You acted suspiciously normal,” Sherry said, blaming Martha for it. “She held your hand preventing you from flailing your arms and talking…Continue reading "Bridges in Cambridge"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 26, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Dr. Slaughter’s Lecture, in brief
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Posted by Tudor on Oct 25, 2004 in Ideas & Images
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In no Particular Order
My brain still throbs with tenderness, and I can no longer form coherent thoughts. This weekend she wore my sweaters. We touched fingers and lips while exploring Cambridge. I bleed for her in an abandoned warehouse. We slept for…Continue reading "In no Particular Order"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 24, 2004 in Various Positions
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Her, Here!
She arrived in town today filled with love and strange urgency. Now she’s sleeping. I want to wake her up and kiss her again, but instead I’m going to crawl in under the covers and hold her for the next…Continue reading "Her, Here!"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 22, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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It Comes with the Job
WLUSU’s exclusive parties are much like board meetings — bearable only when they involve alcohol. I went to Wilf’s Grand Re-Opening party intending to stand on a barstool and profess my love for everyone. But I changed my mind as…Continue reading "It Comes with the Job"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 22, 2004 in Various Positions
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Grand Re-Opening, in brief
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Posted by Tudor on Oct 21, 2004 in Ideas & Images
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Town Hall, Expanded
Food, radical ideas, and the presence of Jason Shim made yesterday’s student town hall a success. Fourty students stuffed their faces with food while offering their insights on Laurier’s strenghts and challenges. “We want to make this as informal…Continue reading "Town Hall, Expanded"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 21, 2004 in Politics
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Town Hall, in Brief
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Posted by Tudor on Oct 20, 2004 in Ideas & Images
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Tarot Reading
I picked ten cards which she arranged carefully on the black cloth. “You are the Knight of Cups,” she said, flipping the first one over, “man of uncertainty and unrestrained emotions. And this, the hermit you carry on your back,…Continue reading "Tarot Reading"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 19, 2004 in Various Positions
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In Other News
On Monday, October 25th, Dr. Slaughter will present a new approach to the war on terrorism. No, I didn’t make this shit up. The public lecture will take place at CIGI located in the Seagram building (57 Erb Street). Be…Continue reading "In Other News"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 18, 2004 in Various Positions
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Rain Dance
After the rain stopped and we finished our coffee, we walked in the park. Everything was wet and crisp and the sky was saturated with colour. We talked. He seems happier now: he’s creating art and buying flutes; he…Continue reading "Rain Dance"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 18, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Winter Rain
Doped up on cough medicine, I painted my room. The paint is called Winter Rain; I chose it because it sounds like poetry. Cold rain pelted my windows as I painted. Martha is away this weekend. I told her…Continue reading "Winter Rain"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 16, 2004 in Various Positions
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Cuddling Cocks
To no one’s surprise, as soon as I imbibed some alcohol I fell asleep on a couch cuddling a giant phallus. I didn’t want to go drinking last night, but Bernard brought Nicky along and there was no turning…Continue reading "Cuddling Cocks"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 15, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Public Service Announcements
1. If you’re looking for a free lunch, come to WLU’s student town hall on Tuesday, October 19. Food will be served sometime between 11:30 and 1pm. The news release gives me absolutely no idea what this town hall involves….Continue reading "Public Service Announcements"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 14, 2004 in Various Positions
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Signs and Paint
The red smudges on my shirt and pants look like dried blood. I got them while painting a banner asking people to talk to me about their concerns; before the paint dried I wrapped myself in it while running through…Continue reading "Signs and Paint"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 14, 2004 in Politics
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Pissing at Sunset
The Turkey Trot is a Haldenby tradition: after devouring the Thanksgiving bird, everybody goes for a walk clutching satisfied stomachs. Though I’m not a Haldenby, this Sunday I too pulled up my boots and walked through fields at sunset…Continue reading "Pissing at Sunset"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 13, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Her Boy Toy
Later, at the dinner table, she made fun of his tenderness, and he laughed again, his eyes moist with bewilderment.Continue reading "Her Boy Toy"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 12, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Goodnight Ladies, Sweet Ladies Goodnight
I’m off to see my Martha: a weekend of ecstasy and good weather ahead of us. Will be back Tuesday to tell all….Continue reading "Goodnight Ladies, Sweet Ladies Goodnight"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 08, 2004 in Various Positions
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Policy Schmolicy
BOD meetings are full of joyful contradictions and self-defeating motions. Last night, for instance, we unanimously passed a risk management policy meant to discourage people form doing silly things like getting shitfaced while on WLUSU events. We felt this…Continue reading "Policy Schmolicy"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 07, 2004 in Politics
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Martha Show
“Your blog is becoming the Martha show,” Jason said. “I’m afraid that can’t be helped,” I said. Just another day and night until I’ll get to hold her again….Continue reading "Martha Show"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 07, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Upcoming
No more foreplay! For two entire weeks ClubLaurier will offer penetrating insight into sex, drugs and rock n’ roll, telling you how to fuck yourself silly while listening to music in Waterloo. You’ll get advice on where to buy sex…Continue reading "Upcoming"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 06, 2004 in Various Positions
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Ecstasy (in one sentence)
Always in a hurry to pull up my pants, I never had the patience to watch sperm disintegrate into a puddle of yellow on a white piece of paper, until today when I found ecstasy in empty rooms late in…Continue reading "Ecstasy (in one sentence)"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 05, 2004 in Various Positions
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Dreams
She dreamt I wasn’t myself. In her dream someone wearing my face started killing people and she couldn’t convince it to stop. I told her I don’t remember my dreams. “My forgetfulness is justified,” I said. “The one dream I…Continue reading "Dreams"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 04, 2004 in Various Positions
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Pink Letters, Roses and PI
My loves gave me roses, pink love notes, and photos of aprons; because I wanted more they also gave me orgasms over phone lines, hours of conversation, and tours of PI. First, Martha’s letter arrived in the mail, neon…Continue reading "Pink Letters, Roses and PI"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 02, 2004 in Friends & Lovers
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Pimp Your Publication Day
I was disappointed: I sure as fuck didn’t take off my clothes just to be ignored.Continue reading "Pimp Your Publication Day"
Posted by Tudor on Oct 01, 2004 in Various Positions
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