Softly Ending
April 13, 2005
April is the month for goodbyes. In 10 days I’m leaving Laurier forever, and my heart is filled with bitterness and nostalgia, love and hate, memories and regrets. It’s about fucking time I graduate, but I’ll miss this messed up place and my messed up people. Others feel the same way.
My lunch last week with the Writing Centre crew reminded me that my school days are winding to a close. I spent years with them, toiling over sentences that often made no sense. Now everybody is leaving for exciting places to study law and 18th century literature. “What will you do?” they asked. “I will write erotic novels on my knees.”
After our lunch, I flipped through this year’s yearbook. It was full of people I didn’t know doing things I didn’t care about. It made me kinda sad. Yearbooks are no longer collective storybooks, but mass-produced memories that don’t parallel anyone’s existence. It made me thirst for images of my own experiences. If I had to put together a photobook of my last few years at Laurier, it would look like this:
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Laurier, you and I have been through a lot of bullshit together; I’ll miss you, I’ll hate you. I don’t know what happens now …
Posted by Tudor at 09:17 PM in Ideas & ImagesDammit Tudor, you’re making me wistful!
Posted by: Craig on April 13, 2005 at 09:21 PMI’ll second that damnit. I whimpered a little there, and I’m trying my hardest not to be sad, really really trying to stay tough and ignore it. That is, until Fall comes again and instead of returning to the school I’ve come back to to see everyone’s shiny faces I’ll be somewhere else and I won’t know where everyone else will be, except maybe a few. Then I’ll scream and cry and go through several crises. Still trying to stick to that plan…(sniff)
Posted by: Laura on April 13, 2005 at 09:31 PMDamn. I wish I’d found you earlier. Tell me you’ll keep blogging.
Posted by: martin on April 13, 2005 at 10:56 PMdood, you RESEARCH erotic novels on your knees!
Posted by: sra on April 13, 2005 at 11:02 PMSo much about those photos make me want to sing “Happy Shiny People”. Let’s hug more, Tudor. Let’s grab bums more. ;)
Posted by: Alysia on April 13, 2005 at 11:25 PMaw shit, has it been a year already?
shout out to stirling’s finger
Posted by: corwin on April 14, 2005 at 01:31 AMI’ll miss you
:’(
Alysia, you and I will have to go around grabbing lovely bums together! Jason, stop being so goddamn sentimental (heheh). Sra, I’m trying to produce words in the most uncomfortable position imaginable — on my knees. Martin, I will now stop blogging. Suddenly. For no reason at all. Laura, it’s all right to go through several crises in the span of a day. Craig, you’re making me wistful!
Posted by: Tudor on April 14, 2005 at 01:25 PMAll right, I’ll admit it, it was a stupid comment.
I guess I’m just going to miss the ‘local’ focus and the possibility of seeing you run naked in a place where I happen to be taking pictures. ;)
hehehe — unfortunately I’m a townie and I’m not going anywhere for a while. There will be plenty of opportunities to catch me running around KW naked :).
And no, it wasn’t a stupid comment. Somebody else asked me the same thing the other day.
Posted by: Tudor on April 15, 2005 at 01:50 AMI’ll miss seeing you around campus Tudor [:o(], but it’s a good thing I can still see you around town [:o)].
Posted by: Shirley on April 15, 2005 at 11:07 AMBe happy you’re done, my man.
Posted by: Borrelli on April 15, 2005 at 11:31 AMoh, fuck yes! I do a little happy dance everyday. I’m definitely looking forward to this …
Posted by: Tudor on April 15, 2005 at 11:39 AMI was too polite to say this when i was sober but that picture of me looks fucking bad.
Pretensiousness++
Posted by: corwin on April 16, 2005 at 11:20 PMyou know that it’s fucking impossible to take pictures of you smiling — that’s the best I can do. drunkenness is awesome!!!
Posted by: Tudor on April 16, 2005 at 11:35 PM