July 2005 Archives
Fisheye Stratford
All good stories should begin like this: After dancing naked with Laura in my kitchen all morning long, I got on my bike and went to see Amy in Stratford … Then, things should go to shit for the main…Continue reading "Fisheye Stratford"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 31, 2005 in Here & There
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The Tudor Show
Next Saturday is Blogathon day — that’s when I’ll be writing something funny, something sad every half hour for 24 hours. Hopefully. You see, so far I received exactly $0 in pledges, which makes it hard for me to participate…Continue reading "The Tudor Show"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 30, 2005 in Writing & the Media
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Dearest Trevor
I tried the wooden hand again. It didn’t exactly work but it brought back wonderful memories. That is all….Continue reading "Dearest Trevor"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 30, 2005 in Various Positions
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Battle of Innocence
On a rainy morning, we wandered for an hour amongst ruins dreaming of a life without worries or inhibitions. She was bleeding slightly, but we felt free and innocent and everybody was our friend. I kept trying to pull…Continue reading "Battle of Innocence"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 29, 2005 in Ideas & Images
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Fish Aye
When I took out my new fisheye lens from its cage, you said, “Here, take a picture of a picture and feed it into your machine.” You looked so beautiful and distorted sitting naked on my floor, holding my…Continue reading "Fish Aye"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 28, 2005 in Ideas & Images
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Reality Manipulation In Victora Park
“5:30,” Opal said. “In front of the overgrown clock.” The afternoon sun was gleaming brightly on our reality-manipulation devices when the three of us (Opal, Martin, and I) approached the clock tower in Victoria Park from different directions. For…Continue reading "Reality Manipulation In Victora Park"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 27, 2005 in Here & There
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The ‘Naked In The Rain’ Meme
Rain usually makes me feel lethargic and sleepy, but this evening instead of napping I was inspired by Megan to strip naked and run into my backyard. Megan’s awesome like that. And yes, rain feels incredible on bare shoulders. Go…Continue reading "The 'Naked In The Rain' Meme"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 26, 2005 in Various Positions
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Hillside In Pictures
The weekend was full of smiles and hidden cameras. These are the images that made my camera happy: Funny quote: “The Stars would be awesome if they would shoot Torquil Campbell and burn his corpse in a garbage bin,” Matty…Continue reading "Hillside In Pictures"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 26, 2005 in Ideas & Images
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Hillside (Again)
It all started on Friday evening. We hastily shoved food in our bellies and then leaped out of my front door towards Guelph with watermelons in our hands. “We’re going to the Hillside Festival,” I said to no one…Continue reading "Hillside (Again)"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 25, 2005 in Here & There
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I Never Thought It Would Feel This Way
I just returned wet, thrilled, and exhausted from one intense musical explosion / camping trip / awkward get-together / hippie orgie / sleep deprivation experiment ALL IN ONE. Wow. Hillside Festival, you made something move inside my head, my…Continue reading "I Never Thought It Would Feel This Way"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 24, 2005 in Various Positions
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Blogging For Literacy
While flipping through the photo archives at work, I came across of a smiling photo of Jack Layton at a literacy event five years ago. Back then Jack wasn’t famous — he didn’t lead a socialist party and everyone…Continue reading "Blogging For Literacy"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 22, 2005 in Writing & the Media
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Side of the Hill
Tomorrow Laura and I are leaving for the Hillside Festival to spend our days listening to music and our nights in tents with lovers and internet friends. The Hillside festival is like a hipster orgy or a cancerous tumour:…Continue reading "Side of the Hill"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 21, 2005 in Various Positions
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I Am Not Prince Charming
“You know how to charm a girl,” she said after I told her that her new haircut looked like a mullet. “But I like mullets.” “I’m not wearing a mullet,” she said. “I didn’t say you had a mullet —…Continue reading "I Am Not Prince Charming"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 21, 2005 in Friends & Lovers
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In The Summer We Get Lonely And Menstrual
You told me your secrets and I took them out of context as always: She accused me of being messy, unkept, not concerned about my appearance-like. I’m more single than ever. Alone, I spoke to spectres through unfamiliar pain and…Continue reading "In The Summer We Get Lonely And Menstrual"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 20, 2005 in Sentences About You
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How To Cook Pasta And Talk Nonsense
When you’re finally alone with her in the kitchen, rip each other’s clothes off like monsters of longing in a world of dreams. “Now let’s make pasta,” she’ll say slightly out of breath. For a second you think something kinky…Continue reading "How To Cook Pasta And Talk Nonsense"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 19, 2005 in How To
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Red Droplets of Bitterness and Joy
I ran out to pick currants in the rain today and suddenly felt like a kid again. When I was five I roamed through my grandparent’s yard naked and free. I knew all of the strange fruits of the…Continue reading "Red Droplets of Bitterness and Joy"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 18, 2005 in Various Positions
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Bourgeois Faggots
The Loop Clothing party had too little porn and too many hipsters. “Bourgeois faggots,” (as Borrelli calls them) swarmed the place: they were crawling in the vents, swinging from pipes, sitting on the couches, and defecating in dark corners….Continue reading "Bourgeois Faggots"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 16, 2005 in Various Positions
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Like God, Chicken is a Flightless Bird
After a group of 13 year olds and their teacher publicly mocked him, Jason Shim finally came to terms with his Asian nature. “I’ve never been happier,” he told us at Morty’s while our mouths were full of chicken…Continue reading "Like God, Chicken is a Flightless Bird"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 15, 2005 in Friends & Lovers
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Summer Rain
When it rains, I go outside on the concrete porch and listen to the CDs that Stacey made me. Jazz is funny, and sad, and it gives me strange urges to splash in puddles. But I don’t. Instead, I smell…Continue reading "Summer Rain"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 14, 2005 in Various Positions
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Fairies Battle Banality
Last night I told Laura I was going to be on Martin’s radio show and she offered to drive me to the station. The trip there was almost as memorable as the show itself — we nearly wrecked her…Continue reading "Fairies Battle Banality"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 13, 2005 in Here & There
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WLUSU (Once Again)
With our faces full of meat, Dave and I talked about cock and WLUSU during dinner yesterday — the two things are very much alike if you think about it. Dave’s stories of backbiting and vaguely unethical behaviour within the…Continue reading "WLUSU (Once Again)"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 12, 2005 in Politics
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They Call me the Organizer
I knew the day would come when I would have to move office furniture. Indeed, I’ve been training for it for a long while by showing up at my friends’ houses unexpectedly and rearranging their couches. If you’re going to…Continue reading "They Call me the Organizer"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 11, 2005 in Various Positions
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Bug Out
It takes a special kind of crazy to bike 20 km in the summer heat to show up to a car show, but that’s precisely what I did today. Luckily, the people exhibiting their cars were in no position…Continue reading "Bug Out"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 10, 2005 in Various Positions
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All That Jazz
By the time I returned to the Jazz Festival at 8 o’clock in the evening, the crowd expanded to the adjacent parking lot and the six black men on stage were feeling the music. Earlier in the day the…Continue reading "All That Jazz"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 09, 2005 in Various Positions
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A Joke, A Fight, A Kiss in the Night
We went to visit Anna and Mike last night just as a storm gathered overhead. Unfortunately, the rain never came. Instead of ripping off our clothes and dancing naked in Anna’s backyard like the savages we are, the four…Continue reading "A Joke, A Fight, A Kiss in the Night"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 08, 2005 in Friends & Lovers
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Evenings
The clouds were fantastic at sunset when Laura and I got into her car and drove down country roads to prowl through cemeteries. She wanted to take pictures of graves, white, fragile, and weathered by time. I left her alone…Continue reading "Evenings"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 07, 2005 in Various Positions
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So Many Daves
The Dave Alexander pool on flicker is quite possibly the best thing ever. Regan said it best: this group is for collecting images of dave, not for humiliation, but to examine exactly why he’s so photographable in the first…Continue reading "So Many Daves"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 06, 2005 in Various Positions
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Getting Nailed
Someone in my neighbourhood has been sadistically nailing bunnies to trees and wooden fences. I think that’s pretty great….Continue reading "Getting Nailed"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 05, 2005 in Various Positions
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Talk about Dead Girlfriends Day
About three months ago I was in the library on a sunny Sunday afternoon waiting for Laura’s shift to end. Having nothing better to do, I looked through the bookstacks for something to read, anything. After about five minutes…Continue reading "Talk about Dead Girlfriends Day"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 04, 2005 in Friends & Lovers
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‘Cause We’re the Fishes
I’ll tell you something: the creeks that run through the city are full of carp squrming beneath the surface. Dozens of them! The waters are as murky as their flesh, and you can jump in there and grab them with…Continue reading "'Cause We're the Fishes"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 04, 2005 in Various Positions
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Downtime
My webserver has been down for most of the day (again) which makes me feel pissy as fuck. I want technology that doesn’t break down and knows no pain or hunger….Continue reading "Downtime"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 03, 2005 in Technology
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How to Celebrate the First of July
It’s Canada day. Put a bottle of wine in your backpack and bike down dusty country roads towards New Hamburg to find Laura. There’s no better way to celebrate confederation than by getting drunk and naked with her. In…Continue reading "How to Celebrate the First of July"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 02, 2005 in How To
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Elsewhere Today
Have you seen flickrDogs yet? It’s a whole blog devoted entirely to canines and today they’re featuring one of my puppy photos. I suddenly want a dog. Badly.Speaking of photos, if you have a hard time organizing the 20,000…Continue reading "Elsewhere Today"
Posted by Tudor on Jul 01, 2005 in Various Positions
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